Recently I had an incident where my sister-in-law to be used the baby name that I had picked out since I was 10. Though she knew about this, and I had mentioned it to her multiple times over the last 3 years, I now have a beautiful niece with the name I grew up dreaming about. This got me thinking, so I did a little research. Baby name-napping is surprisingly a pretty common occurrence. People naturally "imitate" or copy each other, so it is no surprise mothers and daughters often share tastes, and friends often look more alike as they grow older. This name-napping however, can be a touchy subject. I won't pretend I wasn't upset when I found out my sister-in-law was using my baby name because I was. And, it upset me again when the baby was delivered and officially had that name. It was one of those moments in life where you learn that sometimes you just need to let it go, and that things do not always go as planned.
Situations regarding name-napping are often very different, and everyone handles the situation differently. Any topic dealing with babies is often touchy, so that includes this one. I have my own views on the topic, as does everyone else. My best advice is not to share your baby names. I learned the hard way that sharing the names you like may put a bug in someone else's ear. Whether they know it or not, this bug may stick with them for awhile, and next thing you know, they are using your baby name. My new plan is to share baby names that I don't like. This way, if someone uses the same name I do, I know it will coincidence and not "name-napping".
If it does happen to you, there are a couple ways you can deal with it. If the baby is born, get over it. You will be upset, but it is a permanent thing now, and it is better to move on than harm relationships. If your friend uses the same name, it is not that big of a deal. Friends can use the same names because their kids are not related. Close relatives are a different story. It takes awhile to get over, but there are SO many names out there now, that you have endless options and are sure to find something else you like. If the baby is not born and you find out you are a victim of name-napping you can talk to the name-napper about the issue. I know this is hard, but make sure if you have the conversation, it involves as little emotion as possible (emotional conversations can cause a lot more harm than good). And think about this, where did you get the name you like? Chances are you got the name from someone else... When you calm down about the issue, consider it a compliment. You OBVIOUSLY have great taste if someone else is copying you.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Weddings, Showers and Babies
Welcome to the Average Girls' Guide to Doing it All! This blog is dedicated to helping the average girl with everday concerns, weddings, party planning, and babies. With all of the things that happen to a girl in her lifetime, she needs help sometimes. Even if this help is really just a tip on how to do something better, or cheaper. I am a self-proclaimed do-it-yourself-er, and bargain hunter. I have a degree in Marketing, and an eye for art. I love to be creative and often find ways to make things easier, cheaper, and more stylish. I also like to address those "forbidden" concerns, those tough issues that seem like there is never a "right" answer. I also enjoy rating new products and letting people know if those products that seem to good to be true, really are. I love suggestions and I am always looking for new things to talk about.
Today's post is about me. I am currently at the end of planning a wedding, I have planned two baby showers in the last few months, and seem to be surrounded by babies. Wedding planning is a lot of work, and though I would LOVE to plan someone else's wedding, I have almost hated planning my own. With all of the other things going on in my life, it made it all the more challenging.
When a little girl dreams of her wedding she doesn't picture opinionated family members and friends, vendors who are hard to get a hold of, and all of those silly little things that the bride realizes need to get done exactly a week before the wedding. Not to mention the financial conversations that go on, and never seem to turn out that well. Through these experiences, I have learned how to handle a lot of awkward situations, do things myself, and do them for less. I have also learned that a good friend and a good glass of wine can sometimes be the best type of therapy.
Today's post is about me. I am currently at the end of planning a wedding, I have planned two baby showers in the last few months, and seem to be surrounded by babies. Wedding planning is a lot of work, and though I would LOVE to plan someone else's wedding, I have almost hated planning my own. With all of the other things going on in my life, it made it all the more challenging.
When a little girl dreams of her wedding she doesn't picture opinionated family members and friends, vendors who are hard to get a hold of, and all of those silly little things that the bride realizes need to get done exactly a week before the wedding. Not to mention the financial conversations that go on, and never seem to turn out that well. Through these experiences, I have learned how to handle a lot of awkward situations, do things myself, and do them for less. I have also learned that a good friend and a good glass of wine can sometimes be the best type of therapy.
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